pork soda

i have finally figured it out! it's the soda. of course! the caffeine is killing me. not really killing me, but turning me into a zombie. how does caffeine turn you into a zombie you ask? oh you didn't ask? well then forget it. but if you're interested, here's how it does.

i don't really start to feel awake until i go to the gym usually around 7 or 8 in the evening. i feel tired and sleepy all day and then finally i get to sweat and burn some calories. this desk job is harder than i thought it would be. i keep thinking of ways to add a little exercise to it, like replace my chair with a workout ball or turn my desk into a standing post. i'm not sure those would fly in my office, but it's worth a shot. i think i'm sleeping too much too. you have to vidulent when you get older. if things start feeling different, you got to start using placebos and control techniques. i don't even know what i'm saying.

i was looking over the book i wrote like three/four years ago. it's actually pretty good. i'm re-typing it and adding some stuff here and there to make it better. i'm thinking about sending it to oprah once i'm done. i'm serious. i'm going to send it to oprah, she'll read it, then tell everyone to read it and they will because she said so and then i'll be a millionaire and i workout right away in the morning and feel awake all day. and eat oatmeal with blueberries. and toast. and pancakes. i'm thinking about starting a phrase that reads: "it's better than pancakes." i'll use it if something is really good. i think people will appreciate it if i tell them that they're better than pancakes.