books of moses

yo la tengo was great. i can't shake the feeling though that i don't belong at concerts anymore. i'll still go, oh yeah, i'll still go and some i do feel like i belong. like when i went to blind pilot and the low anthem. but at yo la tengo we were standing around like 16 year old kids who all had the same haircut, all moved the same way and all attached amazing importance to every movement of sound. i know this because i used to be those kids. but now i'm older and i like going, but i don't like the standing, i don't like the crampness, i don't like the screaming. i need a personal performance in my garage. when i get a garage.

there was one girl there who overheard me talking to pete about how the first band sucked. and she started shaking her head, telling me i was wrong. i made a smart-ass comment in her direction and then she proceeded to ask me to name my top ten bands of all time because that's how she determines character in her book. that's how she said it. so i named hanson, foreigner, deep blue something. i couldn't name all ten because she was instantly dying on the inside because she actually believed these were my top ten bands of all time. but it was how she said it, "that's how i judge character in my book." and i thought, do i do that? i don't think i do. character is not something i attach to what kind of music you listen to. some of the best people in my life, the most honest people i've ever met listen to absolute shit. and some of the most untrustworthy, lying, deceptive people i've ever met listened to great music. so a judge on someone's character? no. a judge on their ability to artistically judge something worthwhile and meaningful? yes. so maybe that's what she was getting at, but used a different word that i didn't appreciate. who knows. she was wasted. and married. and hitting on me.

i will be going to another concert very soon. sunday i'm seeing girls at walters. that sounds promising.