the bends

I noticed that Capital records has re-released Pablo Honey, The Bends and OK Computer from Radiohead. In recent years, I have proclaimed my favorite band to be Wilco. I’ve listened to them since I was 17 and something about Jeff Tweedy’s lyrics and melodies beat alongside my own ups and downs as someone living and dealing with America. The older I get the more it seems we occupy the same space in thought.

But for a great period of my life, from about 15 to 23, Radiohead defined my vision of music. They defined my musical experience. Starting with OK Computer and ending with Hail to the Thief, I bought every Radiohead record the first day it came out, once even getting caught in the pre-Allison flooding rains to purchase Amnesiac.

Radiohead made albums of frustrating beauty. They were melodic, yet completely distressed. There was anguish, there was loneliness and there was paranoia. Those were characteristics I knew when I was younger. Who has your best interests? Who are your friends? Who’s really in charge? What is coming up ahead?

I first heard Radiohead like everyone else. Creep was huge. I loved it. It was easy, it was nice to listen to in my truck, but I never thought about this band in any other way except, that was nice, see you later. It wasn’t until I was up late one night watching 120 minutes or some show like that on MTV (remember when MTV had videos, videos that weren’t just teeny pop and hip-hop) and the video for Just came on. I remembered the name Radiohead and decided to watch it. It blew my mind. Not only was the song incredible, but the video was original and I still say it’s one of the best videos I’ve ever seen. So I went out the next day and bought The Bends. It was instantly one of my favorite albums of all time. Starting off with Planet Telex and the line, “you can force it but it will not come” and this atmospheric sound and menace. I had no idea what I was listening to, but I loved it. I devoured it. High and Dry, Fake Plastic Trees, Just, Nice Dream, Street Spirit. These songs still resonate in me. I was dumbfounded by how good this little band had become. From Pablo Honey to The Bends is probably the greatest artistic leap I’ve ever experienced. This was a different band. I began preaching to everyone who would listen and those who would not. Radiohead, you gotta listen to Radiohead. But rarely would anyone get excited. Then it came.

OK Computer hit like a hurricane. I bought it the first day it came out and didn’t stop listening to it for about four years. It ranks as one of the greatest albums of all time. Start to finish, it’s leveling. The melodies are four star. The lyrics are disconnected and disjointed, yet as a whole, they form a cohesive response to a world that was beginning to spin too fast and too loose. The next thing I knew Radiohead was huge. But it didn’t make me like them less. I was proud of them. I thought I was witnessing the response to the release of Sgt. Peppers. That is what it felt like, I would think. Because you don’t witness that kind of response to an actual work of art very often. This wasn’t Cher filling stadiums, this was Radiohead, singing about refrigerators buzzing and the karma police. It was amazing.

Since then, they’ve released more great albums (Kid A, In Rainbows) and some okay ones (Amnesiac, Hail to the Thief). And as I’ve gotten older, my identity has shifted some and I now find myself less confused and more comfortable with who I am and those around me. I still feel the world is out to get us, so I will always come back to Radiohead. And I’ll always come back to that time when I 15 hearing “comes like a comet, suckered you but not your friends, one day he’ll get to you and teach you how to be a holy cow, you do it to yourself, you do, and that’s why it really hurts.”

It’s not an understatement to say Radiohead helped shape the way I look at the world. That’s something that will stay with me longer than any song or album.